NELLE 6 | 2023
alisa has grown up now the rabbit’s house is smaller than alisa now alisa
squeezes her ribs with her elbows and tries not to breath
because if you breath in you’ll inflate like a balloon and burst
if you breath out you’ll turn into a tiny spot and disappear
now alisa is too small even for herself and too short
we all know what happens to those whose legs
dangle off the end of childhood beds we all lay
silent in the darkness trying to fall asleep and feeling
the weight of life on ourselves like the weight of another’s duvet
the weight of life on ourselves like the weight of a stranger’s body
now that alisa has opened the box with the secret she
no longer sleeps no longer cries no longer bleeds
alisa has grown up and has walked out of her body
she lifted the lid of the box of her body and found
nobody there she grew through
her own roof as a rowan tree she broke
the shell of the egg and spilled out
she crunched the nut
of herself and now
her mouth tastes bitter
i said alisa
i refuse to play your games
i’m no longer a girl
i’m clink
i’m clank
i’m smoke